Rebels: "Twilight of the Apprentice -- Part One" (Ep. 2.21)

-- "There's always a bit of truth in legends."

And now for the moment I've all been waiting for...!

It's Chopper versus an inquisitor, and Chopper...

Oh, wait, no. That's not what I've been waiting for.

I may have indicated in my review of Solo that I was quite excited by the reintroduction of Darth Maul into the movies. Not that I was ever one of those huge Darth Maul fans after The Phantom Menace. In fact, I wasn't all that impressed with Darth Maul. But, the truth is, he was never supposed to be dead dead. Lucas always intended to bring him back and the only reason he didn't come back in Attack of the Clones was because Ray Park opened his mouth about it within a few weeks of the opening of Phantom, so Lucas brought in Darth Tyranus instead. Still, I can understand people not being thrilled about him being brought back. Being cut in half is pretty final...

Unless you take into account that General Grievous was a heart and a brain and eyes in a robot body. I'm assuming that's all they were able to salvage of his organics. Compared to that, Maul was a veritable treasure trove!

All of that aside, I've found Maul to be a much more interesting character since they brought him back in Clone Wars. Not right at first, but, as they've gone along, they have deepened his character and complicated his motivations. I very much want to see what they have in store for him, and I am going to be sorely aggravated if we don't get the rest of the Solo trilogy, not for Solo but for Maul.

His first appearance here in Rebels is intriguing, which is about all I'm going to say about it until I get a chance to watch part two. I guess you'll just have to come back for that.
Or go watch it yourself.

"You don't exactly outrank me anymore."

"In my book, experience outranks everything."

"Then I definitely outrank you."

Rebels: "A Princess on Lothal" (Ep. 2.12)

-- In our position, you take what you can get, Kid.

Fuuuuuccck! When the Empire deploys AT-ATs, they just drop them! They DROP them! That explains the legs on them, I suppose.

My son couldn't buy it, though. Me, I was willing to give them that one. It was when Kanan -- see picture above, which is really cool -- went running at the AT-AT with a lightsaber THEN cut right through its legs (yes, two of them!) as if they were butter that they lost me. I mean, they had just dropped the AT-AT from a spaceship and the legs had supported the drop! But Kanan can just slice through them as he runs by? I don't think so. Go back to Phantom Menace and how long it took Qui-Gon to cut through one of those doors on the Trade Federation ship. Oh, wait! He wasn't able to do it in time. AT-AT legs have to be at least that tough.

Anyway...

This episode features a certain princess, and it's a pretty decent episode. You know, except for the bit mentioned above and that Leia seems to be unable to connect with people. Hmm... Actually, I suppose that's just Leia, so it makes sense when Kanan tells her that she should talk to Ezra because she understands what it's like to be young and have a lot of responsibility that she kind of just fails at that.

This is Leia before she's a senator. At least, that's what I'm assuming because her father is the senator from Alderaan. It's interesting to see her from this perspective, but it's more interesting to see the Empire's view of Alderaan. It gives a little insight on why Tarkin becomes so willing to blow it up.

"Wait, why does she get to give orders? I don't get to give orders."

Rebels: "The Future of the Force" (Ep. 2.10)

"We're away from trouble now."

If there's one thing I can say it's that Ahsoka knows how to make an entrance. I wonder if that's a force skill?

During Ahsoka's investigation into whom the Sith Lord is -- that would be Vader, who she doesn't know is Anakin -- she uncovers the inquisitors' interest into... something. She doesn't know what it is; she just knows they're after something. Or somethings. She also knows that if the inquisitors want something, they probably shouldn't get to have it. At the least, the rebels ought to know what it is they're after.

She recruits Kanan and Ezra to help her find out what's going on.

There's a certain amount of tension that exists in this show that didn't exist in Clone Wars. We know what happens to Anakin and Obi-Wan and many of the other characters, but we don't know what happens to Ahsoka and she's not the star of this series. It's plausible that she could go at any time, though, at this point, there's a lot of audience investment in the character, so it makes for situations like The Phantom Menace. I mean, no one expected Qui-Gon to die.

For that matter, we don't have any confirmed future inclusion for any of the characters past Rogue One, so it can leave you guessing during an episode like this.

"You would question me, Seventh Sister?"

"Only when you're wrong."

Flippers

My first experience with flippers came in the mid- to late 90s when I worked at Toys R Us. We didn't call them flippers -- the words we used were much less kind, though there may have been some flipping (of the finger) involved -- and, actually, that may not be the correct term at all for what they are. I'm using it because these are the same kind of people as house flippers, which is the correct term for those particular people, so I'm applying it here, too.

It all had to do with Star Wars.

The few years prior to the release of The Phantom Menace saw a huge resurgence in Star Wars action figures and collectibles, and there was, evidently, a lot of money to be made from it on eBay. Every morning by the time the store was ready to open, there would be a group of about a dozen men waiting to get in and race -- and I do mean race, as they were each trying to get to some section of the store first, mostly to the Star Wars action figures but also to the Hot Wheels -- to the action figures to get first grabs at the rare figures that they could resell on eBay. And it wasn't just Toys R Us. They ran a circuit every morning to each store as they opened. Toys R Us, with the latest opening time (9:30), was last on the list after Wal-Mart and Target and wherever else these guys would stop to raid shelves.

Their behavior -- and none of these men were what you could call "nice;" in fact, they were often nasty and vile and were constantly angry at employees when they couldn't find the pieces they were looking for -- served only to deprive actual collectors or kids from being able to find the action figures they wanted. It wasn't uncommon to have a customer come in later in the day, someone who just wanted to finish a set of figures or, god forbid, open it and play with it, and ask about a particular figure that we were out of only to have one of these guys pop up and say, "Oh, I have one of those. It's in my car right now, in fact. I'll sell it to you. Just $20." Something said dude had paid $6 for just that morning, that being why it was still in his car.

Then there was the issue of them bringing back bags and bags of unsold figures every few weeks, once the craze for a particular figure had died down, and wanting their money back, something we were obliged to do since these guys kept every receipt ever for just this purpose. It was kind of a nightmare, and everyone dreaded the opening of the store each morning and having to deal with the orc horde.

At least with house flippers there are some positive things that can be said. Generally speaking, they do do work on the houses they buy so that they can jack up the price for the resell. It made it hell when we were trying to buy a house several years ago, though, as we were constantly losing out to cash bids, often lower than our bid, from flippers. Of course, one of the big problems with house flippers is that many of them make only cosmetic changes to a house, cheap fixes, and leave any underlying issues for the new owner to deal with, issues that are frequently more difficult to spot because they've been "painted over."

Which brings me to my recent experience on eBay in selling off my comics and stuff. As I mentioned in the linked post, one of the guys I dealt with is a flipper. Actually, it was several guys. I know because they all told me that the reason they were interested in my auction was because they thought they were going to be able to take advantage of me to get some cheap comics they could resell. No, they didn't state it precisely like that, but I'm sure that since I mentioned in my auction text that I'm trying to clean out my garage they all thought I didn't really know what I had. That tends to be how that goes. People who at one time or another when they were young collected something and stored it for some length of time until they've come across it again and decided to get rid of it without doing any research about its current value. [And having worked in several comic shops when I was younger, I've witnessed comic shop owners steal from people frequently by offering them the equivalent of nothing for very valuable books because the people bringing them in didn't know the value. But that's a different kind of story.]

Just to be clear, I don't have a problem with people trying to make a buck. What I do have a problem with is people taking advantage of other people to do it. And I find it extremely annoying when people do it within the same venue as the seller and the buyer, as with the kid who wanted the Star Wars action figure who had to pay $20 for it from some unwashed guy's trunk. These guys basically want money just for standing there.

Here, let me give you an example:

Some years ago (like 20), I wanted to get rid of a few comic books that were pretty hot at the time. Probably, I wanted to buy Magic cards with the money; I don't remember. I took the few issues in to the shop I frequented to see if he was interested. I already knew he didn't have any of the issues available. They were hot books, and I only wanted a fair price. They guy wouldn't have had a problem moving any of them. He looked through them and handed them back to me, saying he wasn't interested. Which was fine.

However, a customer had come in while were were talking and after the owner had handed the issues back to me, the customer said, "I'll take that one," pointing at one of the issues.

Talk about being trapped. What I wanted to do was walk out into the parking lot and sell the guy the issue, BUT I was standing in this dude's store, and I didn't feel right about that. I allowed the owner to play middle man and give me $10 only to turn around and sell it to the other guy for $20. (Or some approximation like that.) The store was, after all, the owner's venue.

The problem with these eBay dudes is that eBay is not a venue which belongs to them. They're just people milling through the crowd getting in between sellers and actual buyers, people who want to own the pieces, not resell them at a higher buck. They damage both sides, and they feel entitled to do it, as demonstrated by the anger aimed at me when they were denied something which didn't belong to them. Each of these guys, these assholes, felt as if I had cheated them from something they deserved. It's that attitude that is the problem. A white dude entitlement problem. These are, essentially, the same guys who would hang out outside of Toys R Us waiting for the doors to open every morning. Only those guys, the Toys R Us guys, were actually a step above these guys on eBay.

Turandot (an opera review post)

The 2017 opera season is underway. This is a short season, only five operas which will all be presented this year, but that's because the San Francisco Opera is presenting Wagner's Ring Cycle next summer! I can't wait. This is such a big deal that we had to purchase the tickets for it LAST YEAR. I have almost an equivalent anticipation for this as I did for The Phantom Menace or Raimi's Spider-Man. But none of that has to do with this opera, so let's get to that.

Turnadot was Puccini's last opera; in fact, he died before it was finished. That he died is just part of what makes this particular opera problematic and, often, controversial. The ending most often performed is by Franco Alfano and was written from Puccini's notes; however, that did not keep it from feeling inauthentic to me, not least of which was because the ending is happy. I'm not saying the ending wasn't good, and Puccini may have intended a happy ending for this one, but it didn't feel quite right to me. It's not really what he's known for.

That said, the opera was amazing. Turandot contains one of the most famous arias in all of opera: "Nessun dorma" or "None Shall Sleep." In the role of Calaf, Brian Jagde (seemingly becoming the SF Opera's tenor De Niro) performed it admirably.

The other big issue with this opera -- skipping over the issue of the name and the disagreement about how it should be pronounced -- is the... Well, I don't know if it's accurate to call it racism, but it certainly caricaturizes the Chinese. In fact, the opera was banned in China for a while because of it. But, then, the opera is kind of a cultural muddle, for which there are reasons of a sort, but you can look up the origins of the story on your own if you want to know about them.

At any rate, seeing that we are much more culturally sensitive these days than people were in the 1920s, and rightfully so, the San Francisco Opera staged it as a fairy tale. Of sorts. Which has a basis in the original story, so it all works out.

With that in mind, the sets were amazing! I mean, they were seriously amazing. I've commented previously about how great some of the sets have been at the SF Opera, but I think Turandot has had the best set design of any opera I've seen. By far. It was almost like watching a dream. Especially the scene during which "Nessun dorma" is performed. It was like a fairy forest with a bridge... Well, it was really great.

And the costumes were also really good, especially Turandot's. Actually, a couple of her gowns rivaled the sets.

The only possible negative I have about this presentation is that there was actually a lot of that whole standing and singing thing. However, possibly due somewhat to the richness of the sets and that, often, there were background chorus people milling around, it didn't often feel that way, and, when it did, it felt more natural.

This production of Turandot is definitely one of the best operas I've seen so far.

Clone Wars -- Season Four

So... Here we are at the end of season four of The Clone Wars. When the Squid and I started this "little" venture back in -- oh, man, that has been a while ago, now! -- sometime ago, I didn't remember the specific low points of the series. Well, if the series has a low point, season four is definitely it. At least, the beginning of season four, at any rate.

Well, you can go back and look at the individual reviews if you want on the beginning of the season, no need to pick at the scabs, right?

Season four doesn't really get going until episode seven, "Darkness on Umbara." I think the Umbaran arc and the introduction of General Krell is the high point of the season. It's too bad that Krell had to die; he was a great villain. But that story line left some threads lying around that I'm pretty sure we go back to in season five. Or, maybe, six. I don't remember.

Of course, the big reveal of the season is that Darth Maul survived being bisected in The Phantom Menace and, now that he's back, he's out for revenge against Obi-Wan. As I said in my review of "Brothers," I'm still ambivalent about the resurrection of Maul. I think I'm a bit more negative about it, right now, than I was after I finished watching the Maul arc, though, which doesn't conclude at the end of season four. Yes, mostly because I can't remember what happens. What I do remember is being somewhat reconciled to the whole thing after watching the story. Something akin to, "Well, it was dumb to bring him back but, in the end, worth it." I guess I will let you know for sure when we get there.

Possibly, the most significant even of the season, though, is arc in which Obi-Wan goes undercover as Rako Hardeen by faking his own death... without telling Anakin. In the grander scheme of things, I think it's important to show the cracks in Anakin's "faith" so that his fall from grace is more... not really believable... has more context. It's always annoyed me when people talk about how sudden and abrupt Anakin's fall is in Revenge of the Sith. First, a "fall" is always sudden and abrupt, because things are always okay right up until they aren't. But, also, it's not like you can't see it, even just in the movies. The seeds of Anakin's fall are apparent all the way back to Phantom Menace. It's nice to have these Clone Wars stories, though, where we see the development of what will become Anakin's break with the Jedi.

So, yeah, even with season four being the low point of the series, there are still some good arcs in it and what I would call essential viewing.

Clone Wars -- "Gungan Attack" (Ep. 4.2)

-- Only through fire is a strong sword forged.

[Remember, you can sign up to join the Clone Wars Project at any time by clicking this link.]

Well... I still don't like Riff Tamson (the shark guy pictured above) as a villain. I don't remember having such distaste for him the first time I watched the series, but maybe I did and that's why I'm disliking him so much this time. Or, maybe, it's just that I'm not liking this arc much.

I suppose there was a call for this arc of episodes after the appearance of Kit Fisto fighting on Mon Calamari in the original series of Clone Wars shorts (2003). Admittedly, that was a pretty cool episode and seeing Fisto fighting underwater was a neat thing. But that was, what, five minutes or so, and sometimes that's all you need to have. There's not really much of Fisto in this arc, anyway. Not that he's not there, but the focus is mostly on Prince Lee-Char, and he hasn't grabbed me as a character. Which is, I suppose, the point, since this arc is about him learning to become a leader.

Yes, there are Gungans. It's not an issue and has nothing to do with my disenjoyment of these episodes. They're brought in as reinforcements after the Republic forces are defeated and forced to retreat into hiding at the end of "Water War" (the previous episode). It's nice to see them get their time as an underwater fighting force since we didn't get to see them fight in that manner in The Phantom Menace.

There's another episode in this arc, though, so you can probably imagine how it goes.

Oh, and the Separatists have another new droid thing inspired by an ocean creature, as if the jellyfish droid (which are still around) wasn't enough. This one is a big squid thing and is even worse than the jellyfish. It's a physics thing.

Speaking of which, and I understand this one intellectually, but I realized about halfway through the episode that everyone talks normally underwater in this arc. So, yeah, the humans have on underwater gear with helmets, so it makes sense that they would sound normal, but the Mon Cala, Quarren, Fisto, and Tamson all sound perfectly normal, as if they are in air, when they speak. I know they need the audience to understand, but what kid hasn't tried to talk under water at some point? Yes, that was another realization that niggled at me, like the Mon Cala women having breasts.


"Hope is something we cannot allow our enemy to possess."

Clone Wars -- "Pursuit of Peace" (Ep. 3.11)

-- Truth can strike down the spectre of fear.

[Remember, you can sign up to join the Clone Wars Project at any time by clicking this link.]

Sticking with the political story line, we get to see the results of the banking deregulation from the previous episode. The Republic needs more clones, but can they afford it now that the interest rates have more than doubled. The banking clan goads Padme by telling her the Separatists seem to have no problem with the new steepened rate. But the interest alone on a loan of this nature could bankrupt the Republic.

To make matters worse, as the Republic invests more and more into the war, social services are failing due to lack of funds: education, health care, emergency services; you name it, it's suffering. Not to mention infrastructure maintenance.

And if you can't see the parallels being drawn here to what's been happening in the US due to the Cheney war... Hmm... Does Cheney remind anyone else of Palpatine? I'm sure Palpatine was responsible for shooting (force lightning-ing) at least one friend. Or acquaintance. Whatever you want to call it.

Anyway...

There's a vote going to the Senate to approve the new troops and the new loan, the one the Republic can't afford, and Padme and Organa are doing everything they can to stop it from going through, even in the face of violence from Dooku, who wants to drive the approval of the bill.

So... lots of politics... lots of action... What's not to like?
Unless, of course, The Phantom Menace was too deep for you.
No Jar Jar, though.

Clone Wars -- "Hunt for Ziro" (Ep. 3.9)

-- Love comes in all shapes and sizes.

[Remember, you can sign up to join the Clone Wars Project at any time by clicking this link.]

I don't often wonder about the lifespans of the various races in Star Wars because, well, they're aliens. We know that Chewbacca is more than 200 years old and that Yoda is somewhere north of 900, but there's not a lot of revelation about the lifespans of any other of the races. However, we also know that Jabba the Hutt was already a power on Tatooine during The Phantom Menace and was, evidently, still in his prime when he was killed during Return of the Jedi. Along with Jabba, we have Sy Snootles; she was with Jabba in "Hunt for Ziro" and still with him during Jedi. How long does a Pa'lowick live? Because she still seemed pretty spry during her musical number in the movie.

So the action in "Hunt for Ziro" picks up right after the season one ending episode, "Hostage Crisis." We go back to find out why, exactly, Cad Bane rescued Ziro to begin with. We also find out that Ziro had a previous relationship with Snootles...
Um... No, I don't even want to think about that.
And it seems that Hutts really do have a thing for twi'leks. Or maybe it's just that everyone has a thing for twi'leks. They do seem to be every sentient beings favorite dancers.

But Cad Bane!

Oh, wait... We also get to meet Quinlan Vos, a Jedi that Obi-Wan, to put it nicely, doesn't seem to care for. This particular thing is interesting to me, because, really, we are almost always presented with Jedi who all get along with each other and have no real issues. Sure, they have disagreements, but they seem to all like each other just fine. However, Vos is a Jedi Obi-Wan seems to have a strong personal dislike for. He's too undisciplined. At least, that's how it seemed to me.

But, as any good Jedi should, Obi-Wan doesn't let his own feelings get in the way of what he needs to do, and Vos and Kenobi work with each other to track down Ziro.

And, of course, run afoul of Cad Bane. That's a good fight scene and shows just how capable Bane is. The episode is worth it for that scene alone.

Clone Wars -- "Corruption" (Ep. 3.5) (Gadreel)

-- The challenge of hope is to overcome corruption.

[Remember, you can sign up to join the Clone Wars Project at any time by clicking this link.]

One thing I think (know) people often (almost always) miss about the prequels, especially The Phantom Menace, is how much political commentary is contained therein. People get all distracted and wound up by Jar Jar and miss everything else. Some of everything else being a kind of warning about the state of politics, right now, and I think we can see even more of what was in Phantom going on in the US, right now, with the polarization of Congress and the fear-mongering of the Republicans, especially Donald Trumpatine. This episode touches on the same material.

And it's eerily reminiscent of the water issue in Flint, Michigan.

All of that said, I like seeing Satine back even without Obi-Wan in the story.

Mandalore is having some issues due to the fallout of the previous Mandalore story line in which they assert their neutrality. Now, no one will trade with them, and things like food prices are skyrocketing. Corruption and the black market are booming. That's really all you need to know. That and Padme joins Satine in an investigation dealing with sick school children.

Just go watch it.



Now for Angel week!

"Gadreel" is FREE! today! Go get a copy!

Star Wars: A Discussion (Episode VII)

My first 3D movie was way back in 1983, Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone. I can't say I thought much of it. What I remember is the movie being pretty terrible and the 3D being blatant. What I mean by blatant is scenes where something comes right out at you for no other purpose than coming right out at you to show off the 3Dness of the movie. That's not always a bad thing, but it usually is. Probably the only significant thing about this movie is that it was Molly Ringwald's first "big" movie, right before Sixteen Candles. It did not make me ever want to see another movie in 3D, though.

That was a thing I pretty much succeeded at. At least, I can't think of any other 3D movies I saw through the rest of the 80s. It lasted all the way up to U2 3D, which came out in 2007 in Real 3D. The U2 concert movie was the first to use the Real 3D technology and, frankly, it was amazing. At times, it felt like you were in the arena, the show was so immersive. And that's probably about as close as I'll ever get to seeing U2 in concert, so I was glad to have seen the movie in the theater.

Of course, it was quickly followed by other movies using the technology: Journey to the Center of the Earth, Coraline, and who knows what else since 3D quickly became a "thing" and Real 3D faded into the sea of new digital 3D technology. However, I was hooked. Unlike the old red/green 3D thing, the new 3D stuff, when done well, could make you feel almost like you were in the scene.

However, it didn't take long for theaters to raise the prices on the 3D shows high enough to make them not worth it. Not when you have a family of five, at any rate. So, except for special exceptions, we don't do 3D movies anymore. One of those exceptions was the re-release of The Phantom Menace in 3D but, rather than talk about that here, I'll direct you to my review of that.

In relation to The Phantom Menace, I have to say that I was upset when Disney called a halt to the 3D conversion of the other Star Wars movies. Star Wars was made for 3D. The Force Awakens just reinforces that. So, yes, we went to see Episode VII in 3D. I think that's the first 3D movie I've seen since we saw Episode I in 3D back then in 2012. The 3D experience of Force Awakens was amazing.

It's not because there are things flying at you and being blatantly 3D in your face, either. I actually don't remember anything like that in the movie. With Force, it's all about the environment and how much more rich and interesting it becomes in 3D. The 3D actually allows you to see more of what's in the movie, like steam being released from the Falcon after it lands, than you can see on the flat surface of the 2D presentation. It was... impressive.

Which is not to say that the 3D is perfect. There are still issues when a character is in the foreground but not completely onscreen. That can give a sort of warped appearance as the character is both coming out of the screen at you and being framed in by the wall. But those instances are few. I suppose until movies are actually holographic VR presentations, there will be some issues, but The Force Awakens is the best 3D I've ever seen. Not that I've been watching much 3D but, as I said, but, still...

The short of it is that, if you have opportunity, you should check this one out in 3D. It's worth it. And I hope Disney resumes the conversion of the other five Star Wars movies into 3D. Just... well... I want to see the trench run in 3D. That would be amazing!

Star Wars: A Discussion (Episode V)

Okay, so, now we get to it. How do I really feel about The Force Awakens?
The answer is probably way more complicated than it ought to be, but it is what it is.
So let's start with the good...
Oh! There will be spoilers. Probably a lot of them.
Just sayin'.
[As it turns out, all but one spoiler has been pushed to the next post.]

It's a good movie. A very good movie. I say that not as an evaluation of actually quality but in its ability to make me want to watch it again. [I've seen it three times and want to see it again.] And, hey, it's Star Wars. It's full of action, non-stop action, in fact. The special effects are amazing, as you would expect.

Probably, the best thing about the movie is Adam Driver. It was a bit of an eyebrow-raiser for me when he got cast, though less of one when I found out it was as the villain. He has an interesting intensity about him, and it worked really well as Kylo Ren. He's able to do a lot with his voice and gave a much more nuanced performance than anyone in a Star Wars movie other than, perhaps, Ewan McGregor. Plus, his height made his stalking-walk very effective.

Finn and Rey are great additions.

I think it must be difficult to convey emotion while wearing stormtrooper armor, but John Boyega manages it. He is equal parts enthusiasm and naivete... well, when he's not being freaked out by what's going on around him, that is. I liked his performance, and I like the character.

Rey is great. She is now both my daughter's and my wife's favorite character in Star Wars (okay, well, my daughter may still like both R2 and BB-8 better) AND she is my oldest son's favorite character. Yes, even more than Luke Skywalker (though my son has been a devoted follower of the Empire for years, now, anyway). Daisy Ridley is good in the role.

The Force Awakens is actually as close you can probably get to the "perfect" fan movie for Star Wars. Except not for actual fans in the actual meaning of the word. Most people who call themselves a "fan" of something don't actually mean that; what they mean is that they like the thing. Actual fans invest themselves into the thing they're a fan of, hence the origin of the word from "fanatic." So, sense everyone gets to be a fan these days just for liking a thing, this movie is perfect. It's perfect for all of those people who saw the movies in the theater almost 40 years ago and thought it was great but, then, didn't think about Star Wars anymore until the prequels came out, which they hated, because what they wanted was another experience like A New Hope. The Phantom Menace was not that experience, but The Force Awakens is.

The Force Awakens achieves this by being almost the exact same movie. Except faster and more intense. This is a point of conflict for me. On the one hand, it is a fun movie but, then, I have to ask, "What's the point?" Of course, I know the point: Disney wanted to make a buttload of money, and they have succeeded admirably. But, seriously, from a story standpoint, why tell the same story again? From that perspective, I sort of feel gypped, because I already watched the one where they have to take down the shields so that they can destroy the giant planet-killing machine.

Which brings me, obliquely, to the major issue I have with Force: It feels like a movie about Star Wars but not quite like it is actually Star Wars. Honestly, effectively, that's what it is. The Force Awakens is a piece of officially sanctioned fan fiction. The fact that movie moves so quickly contributes to this feeling. So, while the non-stop action is attractive to the larger audience, the non-stop action also rushes past any feeling of being Star Wars. It does not "feel the Force." Ever. It's the lack of originality that really does it. The movie feels most like the kind of story a kid would make up to use his action figures with and destroy an EVEN BIGGER AND MORE POWERFUL Death Star. (Okay, there was your spoiler.)

Don't get me wrong; this doesn't make it a bad movie. It's an Abrams movie, and Abrams knows how to do big action and all of that. And fast. Very fast. So it's good. And fun. A good and fun bit of fan fiction that Disney has made into actual Star Wars canon. Maybe that's not a bad thing. I don't really know. All I know is that I wish Disney had actually held true to Lucas' story like they said they were going to do when all of this began. But, well, you can't stop them from following the scent of money, I suppose. Clearly, they have taken the "quicker, easier, more seductive" path.

Next post we'll talk about BB-8 and why he exists.

Star Wars: A Discussion (Episode IV)

I suppose we're up to the place where we finally start talking about The Force Awakens, but this still isn't a review. Not, yet, anyway.

If you've read the previous posts in this series, it will come as no surprise to you that the lead up to The Force Awakens was a big deal in my household. We had our tickets not long after they started pre-selling them, so something like a month in advance. My oldest son, who is working on a suit of stormtrooper armor so that he can join the 501st, spent the last year pouring over every tiny little detail released about the movie and engaging in all kinds of theories about it.

I pretty much constantly had to tell him not to tell me the stuff he was finding out online, because I wanted to go into the movie with as little knowledge as possible about it. I already knew more than I wanted to know about the general premise of the story because of all of the Star Wars lore I accumulated back in the 90s before Lucas announced that he was going to make the prequels.

My younger son fell somewhere in between us. He wasn't searching out information, but he wasn't opposed to being told things, either.

It's an interesting thing watching an event draw closer for someone who has been highly anticipating it. See, although my oldest son saw all of the prequels in the theater, he didn't really remember doing that. He was only three for Phantom Menace and, although he was old enough to remember going to see Revenge at the theater, all he really remembered of that was all of the people in costume while we were waiting in line to get in. His memories were all about the movies themselves because he'd seen them so many times on DVD; he had no real memories of the experience of going to see them.

That's not like me, I remember the experience of going to see A New Hope the first time I went to see it. I remember everything about it, including how badly I needed to go to the bathroom and being unwilling to do that because I was so enraptured by the movie. But, then, it was a full year before I got to see it again, so I really had to hold onto that one memory very tightly. And I did, too.

Yes, those were the years before, even, VHS players.

But it hasn't been like that with my kids. Their lives have been full of Star Wars pretty much from the start, so all three of them were very much looking forward to going to see a new Star Wars movie while being old enough to be able to remember the experience of going to do that, my oldest son most of all. You could see the tension growing in him as we got closer, especially in that last week. He was both excited and scared, scared that it wouldn't be as good as he hoped.

He's the reason I saw it twice on "opening" night, Thursday, December 17. We already had our tickets for the 7:00 show, but, back at the end of the summer, he picked up a job at a movie theater. They were doing an actual midnight showing for the employees, and he could bring two people: that was me and his brother. Let me just say: Midnight is not a kind time when you got up at 5:00am. Even for Star Wars.

So... We all went to the 7:00 show, and we all really liked it, but... Okay, so, my wife and my daughter just straight up liked the movie. Enough for them to want to see it a second time (which we did, making my third) and for my daughter to want, now, to go see it again. Neither of them are much into re-watching movies. After coming out of the first showing, my sons and I all felt like we needed to see it again before being able to properly evaluate it. Which is not to say that there were any doubts about likability. But the movie is fast. It's really non-stop action, like a roller coaster, which I'm sure is what Disney was striving for, and there's no time during the movie to ever stop and think about what you're seeing.

That was actually what I said to my wife when we came out of the theater, my only mark against it on that initial viewing: It was too fast. That one thing distracted from the Star Wars-ness of the film, much like the new Doctor Who series is also too fast. Don't get me wrong, I really like the new Doctor Who series and David Tennant comes in at second on my favorite Doctor list (though Capaldi is really excellent, too, and has the potential to hit #2), but, sometimes (frequently), I miss the thoughtfulness of the older shows. I miss that problems were solved by thinking, not by running around (the running is a big deal in the new series). [Part of what I like about Capaldi is that he has brought back some of the thoughtfulness.]

There is a lot of running in The Force Awakens.

Okay, so, what I'm going to say right now is that I like the movie. A lot. But it still only comes in at 4 of 7 of the Star Wars movies, maybe 5 of 7. One of the top 3 is one of the prequels. Next post, we'll talk about why.

Star Wars: A Discussion (Episode III)

No, we're not actually up to The Force Awakens, yet. Don't worry; we'll get there.
Eventually.

When my oldest son was not quite two, my wife gave me the boxed (VHS) set of Special Edition for Christmas. My son was not a TV watcher; I mean, we didn't even have TV (still don't). He wasn't (yet) a video watcher either. He wasn't even two and we didn't really have any videos for him to sit and watch. When I put A New Hope in to watch it, it didn't occur to either of us (my wife and me) that he would pay any attention to it. But he did.

He sat down and was mesmerized by it and, when it was over and he got up, he was someone different. He was Luke Skywalker. I'm being serious. He got up and immediately began running around the house as if he was Luke. It was, quite frankly, amazing. By the time we'd watched the full trilogy, the transformation was complete.

Amusing story time:
Those of you with kids will know that two-year-olds aren't the best talkers in the world. Well, ours started saying "fuck" to us. That, also, was amazing and a surprise, because we couldn't figure out where he'd heard it, since we didn't use that kind of language around him. But he'd run into the kitchen and yell "fuck!" and run out again and, really, just leave us bemused. So, one day, he and I were at Target together going through the toys (because I was still collecting Star Wars stuff at the time and, actually, the kid was starting his own collection, too). As we went down one of the aisles, he began yelling "fuck! fuck!" over and over again. People were looking and I was, frankly, embarrassed. I was trying to shush him and sped up to get off the aisle then, as we rounded the corner at the end, he started pointing, too, and stating "fuck!" even more emphatically. And, so, I looked to see what he was pointing at: an endcap display of Millennium Falcons. The "fuck!" That was all he could say of it. It was one of those "oh" moments and it all made sense.

Still incredibly embarrassing, though, because you can't go to everyone and explain to them that your two-year-old is not really swearing, as if they'd believe you anyway, right?


My oldest son was old enough to see The Phantom Menace in the theater when it came out, though he doesn't remember it -- he was only three, after all -- but my second son was released right in the middle of the trilogy. Oh, um, I mean, he was born during the midst of the prequels. He was a great baby, and we could take him to any movie with us, and he would sleep right through it. We couldn't take our oldest son to many movies, because all he wanted to do was get up and walk around. Star Wars was an exception. But, for the first year of his life, we took the second child to all of our movies with us, including Pearl Harbor, which we were sure was going to wake him up it was so loud, but he slept right through it. That lasted right up until May of 2002.

Don't get me wrong, Attack of the Clones was fine. He didn't sleep through it, but he also didn't fuss. What we didn't know was that our one year and change baby was watching the movie. How do we know? Well, sometime after the release of Clones, my wife and I had gone to see some movie that wasn't Star Wars. I don't remember what movie it was, but it was a date movie, and we took the younger boy with us because he had always been fine in movies. Not this time, though.

No, for that movie (whatever it was), he started crying and fussing almost as soon as the movie started. It was unprecedented.

So I did what any good person should do and I took my son out of the theater leaving my wife to watch our date movie alone. I wandered around the theater for a while holding him. When he finally calmed down, we tried going back to the theater but, almost as soon as I sat down next to my wife, he started back up again. After a couple of times of that, I gave up on going back in and had decided to just stand around in the hallway until the movie was over... except that Attack of the Clones was showing in the theater across the hall, so I decided to go just inside the door to see if I could watch a bit of that.

And this is where it gets interesting because my son, my son who was just over a year old, sat up to watch the movie. He almost instantly became totally engrossed in it. But it's hard to tell things with babies since they can't actually communicate with you, so I decided to experiment with him. Yes, I did an experiment with kid. I walked back to the movie I was supposed to be seeing where he immediately got upset again. Then, I went back to Clones where he started watching again. I went into every other movie in that hall, about half a dozen, and he got upset in every one of them. Attack of the Clones was the only movie he would watch. So, well, we sat down and finished the movie, and he sat quietly and watched the whole thing. By the time it was over, I only had to wait for my wife for about 10 minutes.

For the record, that was the last time we took him to the movies with us. Well, until Revenge of the Sith came out, at any rate.

I don't have any stories like that about my daughter, but she is as fully immersed as the boys at this point. She loves R2-D2, Wicket, and BB-8.
Incidentally, they are watching Return of the Jedi as I finish this up. My wife and I have been out, and they were watching it when we got home. That's the way our house is.

Next post, we'll start into The Force Awakens.

Star Wars: A Discussion (Episode II)

Star Wars fans of my generation (and older) tend to have an inordinate dislike of the prequels. I blame the fans. "But how can it be their fault for not liking the movies?" you might ask. "Isn't it Lucas' fault for not making something that the fans would like?" Well, no, it's not Lucas' fault. It's the fault of fans for, basically, assuming ownership of something that doesn't belong to them. Unwarranted expectations will get you every time.

I want to go back to something I said in my last post, that thing about how I never quit on Star Wars. I think this is a significant point. See, I was there when Zahn's books came out, so to speak. I bought them in hardback. Because I was into comic books, I have first printings of the Dark Empire series from Dark Horse. For a while, I was reading all of the Star Wars novels for no other reason than that they were Star Wars, and I think reading them taught me a lesson.

See, some of them... well, some of them sucked. And sucked hard. In fact, I'll just say it: Kevin Anderson's Jedi Academy trilogy was so awful that not only will I never read anything else by Anderson, but they broke me from reading anymore Star Wars novels. The lesson was not that some things that "are" Star Wars won't be good; it was about expectations. I somehow expected that these things would be great just because they were set in  the Star Wars universe. Well, I didn't really expect that, not in my head, but on some emotional level that is what I expected.

Of course, what I wanted was to be taken back to that feeling I had when I was seven when that star destroyer first "passed over my head" and made me see the world in a way I had never seen it before. But you can't have that feeling again. You can't go back to seven and experience that thing in that same way ever again. You can't have your eyes opened for the first time more than once. That can be a hard thing to learn, but Kevin Anderson beat it into me with his horrid books.

So it was that when Lucas announced the prequels I determined to have no expectations. Or as little as possible, at any rate. I knew these weren't going to be the same movies. I knew the time period they were going to be set in, and I knew what they were about. My goal was twofold: to avoid finding out stuff about the movie beforehand (because I had known absolutely nothing about Star Wars when I was seven and my grandmother took me to see it) and to not have expectations. I already knew where expectations would get me.

Which is not to say that I was not excited. I was right there with everyone else camping out for tickets for the opening midnight show of The Phantom Menace and camping again to get in so as not to have to sit in the front corner of the theater.

Also, I was in no way disappointed with The Phantom Menace. Not even with Jar Jar. He's funny. He makes me laugh. And my kids like him.

I want to make a point here: I was seven when I first saw Star Wars. I was a kid. I'm not saying that I loved Star Wars because I was a kid, but, essentially, Star Wars was a movie for young people, not for adults. There were toys because the target audience was kids. When I went into Phantom Menace, I wanted to go in with as much of that as possible. I wanted to see it with eyes that were fresh and young and with no preconceptions. Part of that was looking at it through the lens of my kids. Well, just one kid, at the time, but each of my kids has loved Jar Jar as they have come into contact with him. Lucas said Jar Jar was a character in the movie specifically for kids, and, from that standpoint, he totally works. So, really, the problem with the Jar Jar-haters is not actually Jar Jar, it's the people who hate him. And, you know what, it shows your age and your unwillingness to be a kid again, as you were when you first saw Star Wars.

And that takes me back to my opening statement: the problem with the prequels is "the fans," the original fans.
It's the truth, and you should just get over yourselves. You don't own Star Wars and Lucas doesn't owe you anything. Didn't owe you anything.
And, actually, you, all of you, should be ashamed of yourselves, because it's because of you that Lucas sold Star Wars to Disney.
/end rant

Yes, I like the prequels. Love them, even. Sure, in my list of Star Wars movies, they are not my favorite, but one of them does come in at #3, and they are Star Wars, so even the one at #6 is way ahead of most every other movie out there.

That being said, there is one problem I have with the prequels: the death of Padme during childbirth. The problem is, as it worked out, that kind of had to be the way that happened but it doesn't fit the previous narrative of Leia having gone with her mother when the twins were split up at birth, and it doesn't fit with Leia's memories of her mother from when she was a young child. So, see, despite the fact that I can see that it Padme's death is necessary from a story perspective, it doesn't work for me because of my own expectation that she should have taken Leia away and raised her in hiding for several years before her death.

But that's it. That one thing is the only issue I have with the prequels.

I don't want to get into anything about how I feel about The Force Awakens, right now, but, regardless of that, I wish that Lucas was the one making them. Just as I wanted to see his story for the prequels, I wanted to see his story for the sequel trilogy, too. As it turns out, despite what Disney said they would do (which was to follow Lucas' original story), according to Lucas, they have strayed from that, and that disappoints me.

But more on that later.

Clone Wars -- "Legacy of Terror" (Ep. 2.7)

-- Sometimes, accepting help is harder than offering it.

[Remember, you can sign up to join the Clone Wars Project at any time by clicking this link.]

I'm not a big fan of zombies, especially more modern zombie stories with all of their supercharged zombies of utter destruction. I just don't find it interesting. That said, this is one of the more freaky and memorable of all of the Clone Wars series. When we got to the episodes with the return to Geonosis, my younger son immediately got excited about getting to this episode (several episodes into the Geonosis story arc); I can't blame him.

The zombies in this story are... well, they're gross and, yes, freaky. And they want to make the Jedi just like them. Now, doesn't that just sound like so much fun?

One of the things I find interesting in this episode is how unstructured the Jedi actually are, despite appearances to the contrary. There is almost no command structure at all. The Masters and Jedi Council are in control but, really, any Jedi may decide to do whatever he or she pleases without regard to what anyone else says. This is why in The Phantom Menace Qui-Gon and, later, Obi-Wan can decide to train Anakin despite the Council's disapproval. Direct orders other than from Knight to Padawan are rare. Each one feels and uses the Force differently, I suppose.

The other thing about this episode is that it might be the clearest picture yet that we've had about the dynamic between Obi-Wan and Anakin. Anakin is always ready to rush in and solve all of the problems with his lightsaber, rarely stopping to think first. Obi-Wan is more cautious. He's the negotiator and wants to see if there's a non-violent answer first. He also likes to have a plan. His role in the relationship is to hold Anakin back, to make him pause and look before leaping. Anakin is always there to jump in when things get hot if circumstances don't go Obi-Wan's way.


"When this doesn't go as planned, which it won't, I'll be ready."

Clone Wars -- "Hostage Crisis" (Ep. 1.22)

-- A secret shared is a trust formed.

[Remember, you can sign up to join the Clone Wars Project at any time by clicking this link.]

You can blame it on Boba Fett. Or, more specifically, whoever it was who decided that Boba Fett should be released as a secret character action figure ahead of the release of The Empire Strikes Back. Between that and the actual bounty hunters in the movie, bounty hunters became a mythos of the Star Wars universe without doing much more than standing in place and being told, "No disintegrations."

With that in mind, it's somewhat surprising that they waited until the last episode of season one to introduce bounty hunters to The Clone Wars. However, they did it by introducing a whole team of bounty hunters, including Aurra Sing (of The Phantom Menace fame). But it's Cad Bane who runs the show, and a very interesting character he is.

And I'm not really going to talk about that other than to say that he's an ongoing character and, possibly, one acting outside of Palpatine's machinations.

This episode has a hint of Ocean's Eleven flavoring. It's not a heist, per se, but each of the bounty hunters definitely has a specific role in the plan that Bane is hatching.

Still, with all of the bounty hunter action that's happening, the true story revolves around Anakin and Padme and the stupid things that people can do for love. Specifically, you guessed it, Anakin. It's another step on the path of Anakin's downfall for him, though it might not appear that way, but it's an obvious thing that Anakin does not hold his Jedi code in the place that he should.

All in all, this is a pretty good episode. I think it would have been more enjoyable as a two-parter, especially if they had done an end-of-season cliff hanger but, maybe, that's not a thing in shows primarily targeted to younger people do. I don't know. It's a fun episode as it is, but it could have been a bit more. Of course, season one Clone Wars doesn't have any actual multi-part episodes, so that's probably part of why it's contained as a single episode.

Clone Wars -- "Mystery of a Thousand Moons" (Ep. 1.18)

-- A single chance is a galaxy of hope.

[Remember, you can sign up to join the Clone Wars Project at any time by clicking this link.]

Picking up on the heels of the previous episode, we see the release of the deadly virus Dr. Vindi was making. This episode becomes one of those "find a cure" episodes that so many TV shows employ at least once. And who's infected with the virus? Padme and Ahsoka, of course. Fortunately, a clue to a cure is near at hand, though you have to wonder how the virus was ever a scourge to the galaxy when they key to the cure turns up so easily.

Yes, yes, I know! Just because they Jedi have knowledge of the cure now doesn't mean anyone knew about it when the virus was a threat. Still...

The problem for me with this episode, at least on this re-watch of it, is that there really isn't any tension. You know that Anakin and Obi-Wan will find a cure for the disease. Of course, you know that. But the whole thing felt too easy for me. I don't remember how I felt about it the first time I watched it. There's also the issue that I'm not overly fond of the racing-the clock-to-find-a-cure-for-a-deadly-disease plot. I have a difficult time buying into those, because, on the whole, they never work the way diseases actually work.

There are some good points in this story, though.

We get Obi-Wan's first (I think (I'm pretty sure (at least, I don't remember any earlier ones))) look of suspicion at Anakin to do with his feelings about Padme. It's unfortunate that the series can't really deal with this dynamic in any depth because Obi-Wan still has to be surprised during Revenge of the Sith that Padme's pregnant by Anakin.

The side character Jaybo Hood is interesting.

We get to meet the Angels of Iego, which Anakin compares Padme to all the way back in The Phantom Menace.

The one other point of interest in the episode has to do with some of the clones who have also contracted the virus. Padme makes a comment about it being a shame that so many of them are sick and one of the other clones tells her that she shouldn't be so bothered about it because it's what the clones were made for. Again, the dynamics between the clones and their "masters" is one of the most interesting aspects of the show, and I'm glad they continue to explore the relationship.

The episode has its good moments, but it's not one of the more interesting ones. Even though it carries the "plague" idea over from the previous episode, it's still really a one-off, and I prefer when they do the story arcs that include character development.

Clone Wars -- "Bombad Jedi" (Ep. 1.8)

-- Heroes are made by the times.

[Remember, you can sign up to join the Clone Wars Project at any time by clicking this link.]

This is probably the episode that no one was waiting for, considering the general view of Jar Jar, that is. Which is not to say that the episode doesn't have its moment, because it does. It's just that most of those moments are slapstick.

The actual conflict in the episode revolves around someone close to Padme betraying her in order to hand her over to Nute Gunray, who is still seeking revenge against her because of the fallout of The Phantom Menace. The real question, though, is why was Padme taking Jar Jar with her on a diplomatic mission. Maybe she thought this was a safe one to take him along on considering that she was going to see someone she was close to. And, yes, we know that Jar Jar becomes part of Padme's diplomatic contingent even by the time of Attack of the Clones, but it's unclear what his role was supposed to be during this particular mission.

What his role ends up being is "Jedi rescuer" as the battle droids mistake him for a Jedi after he throws on a cloak to hide himself during his attempt to rescue the captured Padme. Hi-jinks, of course, ensue.

My issue with the episode has nothing to do with the actual hi-jinks. For what it is, the episode is generally amusing. The issue is that it feels thrown in in order to give some screen time to characters who have mostly been left out of the narrative to this point: Padme, C-3PO, and, even, Jar Jar. So, while the episode does have an important plot point, overall, it feels a little strained and as if it's a bit of comic relief in the very serious story arcs that have so far dominated the series.

This is not an episode I would recommend to a first time viewer, but it's enjoyable enough within the context of watching the series.

"The ship has been destroyed."
"Battle droids?"
"No..."
"Jar Jar?"
"Jar Jar."

Abandoned Places: Maunsell Forts, Star Wars, and "The Magic Cookies"

The Maunsell Forts were both naval and army forts designed by Guy Maunsell. The naval forts (like the Knock John fort pictured below) were primarily used to spot German air raids and prevent them from laying mines in the Thames. Yes, they did that by plane. The forts were built in dry dock, floated out into the estuary, and sunk there. The army forts (like the Red Sands forts pictured above) were designed as anti-aircraft batteries and three were also located in the Thames estuary; the other three were in the Mersey estuary. The forts were responsible for shooting down 22 aircraft and 30 "flying bombs" (basically, an early version of the cruise missile and kind of fascinating). Though the forts were decommissioned in the 1950s, many of them still stand today.

Photo Credits for 3-6 to Wayne Barry under the linked license.

Some of the abandoned places I would most like to see are the abandoned Star Wars "on location" movie sets in Tunisia. Your probably wondering, now, why I'm mentioning this under "M" and not "S," but there's a simple explanation. Most of what you can actually go visit these days are the sets that were used as Mos Espa in The Phantom Menace. Some of these are actual ruins themselves:

This is Ksar (meaning castle) Hadada which was used for exterior shots of the slave quarters outside Mos Espa.

Here are some other abandoned sets from Mos Espa:

Mos Espa photo credits to John Roberts and used under the linked license.

And it's time for some magic cookies!

"The Magic Cookies" is a fun little, short story that always has people laughing when I've read out loud. Sure, the middle schoolers laugh unabashedly, but any adults have also always laughed in spite of trying not to. Just take my word for it; you want to read this. Besides, there's a grain of truth to this one. Okay, maybe more than a grain. Hey, it's not even a $1.00.
Plus! You get a bonus vampire story from Briane Pagel! How can you lose?
Also, the cover was designed and made by one of my creative writing students. He's in 8th grade. Didn't he do a great job!