Who Wants To Talk About Dragons? (pictures I like)

How To Catch a Softball (please take the time to read this post)

Obviously, the first thing you need to catch a softball is the actual softball. It's difficult to catch something that isn't there. That's why there's an absence of things like unicorns, dragons, and dinosaurs in the bedrooms of little boys and girls all across the world.

So here's a thing:
Last year at one of my daughter's softball games, the coach told their best hitter to not hit a home run because they only had three softballs left, and they couldn't afford to lose the ball. Well, she could hit a home run as long as it was one of those that went to the fence and she was able to do it because of the outfielder chasing the ball. Just don't hit it over the fence.
But she did.

They made it through the game, but it's rough when you have to always be mindful of how many balls you have left in the bucket. It's like when you have to budget out how much gas you can afford to put in your tank rather than just filling it up.

To put it all another way, let's just say that girls' softball is not a priority for schools, especially on the non-affluent side of town (where we are), where there is no real support for sports for kids at all, at any age. That stuff is reserved for kids on the other side of town... Now I'm wondering if train tracks play a role in this at all, because we do have them; I just don't know if the tracks divide the city in the way that I'm speaking of.

Of course, then, the next you need is a glove.
But if you can't afford a bucket of balls, you can't very well afford gloves, can you?
And here's the thing:
At pretty much all of the other school in Santa Rosa, the girls playing softball on the high school teams grew up playing softball for the city league and have all of their own gear, like my daughter. But, see, my daughter is the only one of those girls on her team, because we drove her across town so that she could participate in softball when she was a kid. That's a luxury at least 50% of the girls on her team couldn't afford, either because of the significant monetary cost to join the league or because of the significant time cost of practice and games (not to mention the cost of hotels for away games or spending hours and hours driving back and forth because you couldn't afford to stay over night for the tournaments (which is what we did)). All of which means that many of the girls on my daughter's high school team do not have softball gloves or headgear or bats; they depend on the school to supply those for them. Just like a lot of kids depend on the school to supply musical instruments for the music program.

And, yeah, girls' softball just isn't a priority...

Which brings us to the  part where I'm asking you for money. Well, not me, my daughter is. They're holding a fundraiser, and it would be great if you could donate. It doesn't even have to be a lot. Are you drinking some Starbucks sugarbomb coffee right now...?
Are you?
I see you there moving it away from your monitor and/or your phone so that I can't see it, but it's too late! Those things are no good for you, anyway, you know? And that guy who used to be their CEO is a dick, so put that money to better use. At least once. That's all it would take, the cost of one of those overpriced cups of coffee would go a long way to helping these girls out.

So please follow the link and give them what you can. $5.00 would be great! More would be even better! They have a breakdown of how the money is used and what it will provide. My daughter would love to meet her goal!

When the Tracks Don't Meet (or Travelling At the Speed of Plot) (an IWM post)

Have you seen that cartoon of the train tracks being laid? They're coming from two different directions, but there's a problem: The tracks don't meet up in the middle the way they are supposed to. I think there are a bunch of guys standing there scratching their heads. Or something.
Yeah, I would have liked to have posted the image here, but I couldn't find it. You'll just have to pretend.

Usually, where books are concerned, those kinds of things are called "plot holes," but, really, they're not the kinds of things I would call "holes." They're just pieces of... let's call them "discontinuity." I hate them more than the plot holes, I think. Oh, you need me to differentiate?

Okay, let's say your protagonist loses the keys to his car in chapter two but, in chapter five when he's running from the bad guys, he fumbles them out of his pocket: That's a plot hole. And that's not what I'm talking about in this post.

* * *

If you want to find out what I am talking about, you'll have to hop over to Indie Writers Monthly. Oh, you want a hint? Fine, I'll give you a hint. It looks something like this:

Did that get your attention? Good. Now, go read the rest.

Neil Gaiman's Bottle of Milk

Depending upon how you look at things, my kids are either very fortunate or dismally unfortunate. They get great stories all the time about, well, everything. So there is the story about the Troll Bridge and Goblin Town and, now, there is an excavation into Goblin Town going on that I haven't remembered to go take pictures of, yet, but I need to so that I can do a post on that, and, of course, DRAGONS! Sometimes, especially my daughter, the kids get exasperated with me because they have such a difficult time getting merely mundane answers from me. Sometimes, I almost feel bad about that.

Sometimes.

I mean, no one has ever just gone to the store or gone outside to play or, even, just gone to the bathroom. He's been abducted by aliens. And, when he comes back, he's been replaced by a robot duplicate or, possibly, a clone. We're never just having chicken for dinner; we're having dinosaur or, depending upon how many times I've been asked that question, one of the children.

And I might would feel bad about it except I hear my children, delightedly, repeating those stories to their friends.

All of that to say that I loved Neil Gaiman's new book, Fortunately, the Milk, about a father who has to go to the corner store to get milk for his kids' breakfast cereal (because, otherwise, they would have to use orange juice, which is not okay on cereal) and get abducted by aliens on the way home. This was a story after my own heart. It also has dinosaurs.

My own stories don't have enough dinosaurs, I don't think.

It's an illustrated book but not, really, a picture book. The one I have, the American version, is illustrated by Skottie Young. His art is whimsical and funky and fits well with the tone of the book. That does not stop me from also wanting the UK version of the book, illustrated by Chris Riddell, which is not so funky but looks no less interesting. Not that I will be getting a copy of the UK version, because I don't want to pay the shipping on it.

So, yes, the story is whimsical and funky and just a lot of fun, taking off at weird tangents. It has everything you could possibly want from a story like this: aliens, dinosaurs, pirates, time travel... okay, well, it doesn't have cowboys, so I guess it doesn't have everything, but it has an awful lot. If you have young kids (or, even, if you don't), this is a great book to pick up. I'm sure it would make an excellent bedtime reading book. Even though I don't have young kids, I may make mine sit down and listen to it anyway.

Maybe, that way they'll know I'm not the only one that does this.

"Like An Axe Through Bone" and "The Harlot"

It's an interesting thing to see what other people will do creatively with something you've come up with. It's also interesting to see how you, yourself, react to those things. All you have to do is watch a couple of kids playing with one of those kid's toys to know what I'm talking about. Because my daughter has a giant dollhouse and because we recently had an issue around this that relates, let's imagine two five-year-old girls playing at one of the girl's houses with her dolls and dollhouse. In most circumstances, you will not have to wait long before you hear the owner of the dolls and house proclaim, "You're not doing it right!" A well-meaning parent will run in and try to explain that there is no wrong way of doing it, but the owner will continue to protest, "She's doing it all wrong," and, eventually, the girls will get banished from the dolls.

What's not being understood by the other people involved is that the girl (who owns the dolls and house) has an entire world created in her head around her dolls and the house they live in. When the playmate comes in and starts asserting her version, it pushes the girl that owns the toys out of the world she's created. Unless it's something you're prepared for (and what five-year-old is prepared for something like that?), it can be difficult to allow someone else to play in your sandbox. I mean dollhouse.

[Note 1: This is nothing like what happened with my daughter. That involved actual breakage of her stuff when she wasn't in the room, but the dollhouse makes a good example.
Note 2: Girls are actually able to learn cooperative play much earlier than boys, so the whole "you're not doing it right" is something that is much more common from boys.]

All of that to say, when you invite someone to play in your world, you have to be okay when they change the rules. Especially since it's the way that the rules get changed that makes the stories interesting.

Bryan Pedas, in his story "Like An Axe Through Bone," has "changed the rules" of the House Universe. It's no longer 1983; it's the now. The Howard family has been moved forward in time to accommodate a contemporary setting. With the Internet and e-dating. The Howards are in the story, but they're just there to support the actual story, the story of a man who has lost his wife too soon and has allowed his imagination to become his only escape from the pain.

Or is it just his imagination?

It's a great story with goblins and dragons, but those things are not the story; they're just in the story. There are barbarians and lots of fighting and dying, but those things are not the story, either. The story is one man struggling against himself and the pain he's wrapped up in.

I think you all should read it.

Soon.

By the end of this month. I mean, that's when it will be available: by the end of this month.
Shaodow Spinner -- coming soon!

Today, though, is part 23 of the serial release: "The Harlot" FREE! today, Monday, June 10 (and tomorrow, June 11)!

Here's today's complete list of FREE! parts:
"Part Twenty-three: The Harlot"
"Part Twenty-two: The Undying"
"Part Twenty-one: The Chase"
"Part Twenty: The Sword of Fire"
"Part Sixteen: The Dark Tree"
"Part Fifteen: Food of the Garden"
"Part Fourteen: Anger and Laughter"
"Part Thirteen: The Clearing"
"Part Twelve: The Gash in the Floor"
"Part Ten: The Broken Window"
"Part Nine: The Shadow of the Tree"
"Part Eight: The Cold and The Dark"
"Part Seven: The Moth and the Shadow"
"Part Four: The Cop"
"Part Three: The Bedroom"
"Part Two: The Kitchen Table"
"Part One: The Tunnel"
There you go! 17 out of 23 available parts! Grab them while you can >ominous music!<

[Note 3: If you're interested in watching the excitement with my A Game of Thrones 1st edition, you can see the auction here.]

Let's go for a walk... Part 7: Barking at Dragons

As I've mentioned before, there are dragons in our neighborhood. Okay, well, not really in our neighborhood but close enough. They like to race back and forth over the troll bridge at night, and you can see the trails of flame as they run. Of course, it's not really safe to go watch the dragons run around, because, well, they're dragons. Also, there's the troll. He's actually much more dangerous than they dragons, because, really, a human is not much of a meal for a dragon or, especially, a lot of dragons. But for a troll? Well... that's another story. And trolls come out at night, so it's just better to keep your distance. Remember the troll cave under the bridge?

Yes, that is stolen beer. Trolls like beer. Almost as much as they like people.

A couple of weeks ago, my daughter was woken up by a dragon hovering outside her window. It was breathing fire, and it was the sound that woke her up. Dragons are quite noisy when they breathe fire. My daughter was rather fascinated by the whole thing and called me to look. The dragon was a hovering just a couple of houses over periodically letting out jets of fire. I was so caught up in it that I forgot to get the camera. I mean, how do you tear yourself away from a sight like that even for just a moment to run off and get a camera?

My dog, on the other hand, was not fascinated my the dragon. She had followed me back to my daughter's room, and she did not like the dragon at all. She stood on my daughter's bed and barked and barked and barked. It was kind of amusing. It was also worrisome, because you don't really want a dragon to take notice of you, and having your dog crazy-barking at the dragon is not the best to go unnoticed. But, eventually, the dragon moved along, and all was well.

Several mornings later, though, as I was taking the dog out on her morning walk, there was a dragon flying by. It was breathing fire as it went, and the dog just did not like that. Fortunately, the dragon must have had other business, because it continued on its way. So did the dog... she continued on the way of the dragon, following along as best she could and barking barking barking. We didn't make it very far that morning, because, as soon as the dragon was far enough away  that we could only barely hear the fire, the dog ran back home. I suppose she was so satisfied that she'd chased off a dragon that she'd forgotten the whole purpose the trip outside. You know, to take care of business. She had to go out again about 30 minutes later to take care of the business she'd earlier forgotten.

This is my fearsome dragon chaser.

I also discovered how completely impossible it is to take a picture of something while the dog is trying to chase it. It's a good thing the camera has a wrist strap; that's all I can say.

But! You're in luck! A few days later, after getting the dog home from her walk, a few dragons flew overhead. Groups of people went out to watch, and the dog barked from inside the house. I think it must have been kind of crazy-making for her considering that there were five dragons making their way overhead, and she couldn't get at them. At any rate, because I wasn't trying to hold the dog, I was able to get my camera and take some pictures of the dragons for you.

The other three were a little too far off to get pictures good enough to post. That is, if you want a picture of more than a dot in the sky. Or a few dots in the sky.

The thing my daughter found most intriguing about the balloon outside her window was that she could see the people moving around in the basket, bending over and pointing at things, and blowing fire up into the balloon. Especially the fire part. She was sad when it moved away. The dog was not. 

And here's the thing: in life, we often treat things the way my dog treats the balloons. It's just a hot air balloon, but my dog looks at it and sees a dragon. It's this huge threat up in the sky blowing fire, and she barks and barks at it and can't even remember to go potty when they're around. The balloons don't care a thing about my dog, don't even know my dog exists, but they take control of my dog's life when they're around. It's so easy to see things we don't understand and start barking at them to chase them away. Or rant about them on our blogs. Or eat a bucket of ice cream. Or hide under our covers.

There's a lot to be said for stepping back and taking another look at someone, some situation, some thing and figuring out what's going on with it before we raise our hackles and start barking. Sometimes, these things can become "friends" (yes, even situations can become friends), like the cat that my dog used to want to chase but now pals around with. Which is more due to the fact that the cat just decided to not be chased than anything else.

At any rate, a lot of things seem threatening, especially at first, but they aren't always threatening. Often, they don't even know we're there (like agents and publishers that we may decide have it out for us because they sent us a rejection letter). What we usually need to do is sit back and watch and pay attention and see what happens. Sometimes, these things turn out to be good and we should really be taking pictures of them. I guess the real message here is "be smarter than a dog."